


The one where Maria gets Fired

by orphan_account



Series: Stupid College AU [7]
Category: Assassin's Creed
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Gen, Humor, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-22
Updated: 2013-04-22
Packaged: 2017-12-09 04:31:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/770005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Maria's had it with her asshole coworkers, but her method of dealing with them might come with consequences.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The one where Maria gets Fired

**Author's Note:**

> Word count: ~3000  
> Rating: PG  
> Characters: Maria, Altair, Malik, references to others  
> Pairing: AltMalMar if you choose to read it that way, gen if you choose to read it that way  
> Warnings: Not particularly silly. Some scientific jargon in this one, but nothing you’ll need to look up to understand the story.  
> Notes: To those of you new to SCAU, the relevant information you need for this one is that in this AU, Malik, Altair, and Maria share an apartment, and that they’re all grad students doing scientific research.

The lab was empty on a Friday afternoon, and almost quiet. The machines hummed, like they always did, keeping samples cold, keeping water at a stable temperature, gently agitating the tubes in the shake incubator. But, compared to how it usually was, the lab was quiet.

Maria liked her lab; the facility was great, and the equipment was state-of-the-art. Maria loved her project, a bit of genetic engineering and gene splicing. What, or who, rather, Maria didn’t particularly like were her co-workers.

Maria’s lab was…a little high on the testosterone side. Yeah, she snorted at the thought, that was rich, coming from the girl who willingly shared an apartment with two guys, but these guys in here lab weren’t just…male, they were dudes. And there was a difference.

Dr. Sable, her PI, had a big lab, ten students total, if Maria included herself.

Maria had always been friends with guys, mostly, though she’d gotten along okay with girls, too. But she just gravitated toward having male friends. So when she’d started working in the lab, she hadn’t thought it would be a problem. Surely they’d be friendly, accept her; she’d become ‘one of the guys.’

This had not happened.

Instead, they had chosen to gang up on her. They claimed it wasn’t because she was friends with Altair, who they unanimously hated, but she suspected that it actually was.

That, or they were just misogynistic little shits who felt threatened by the idea of a woman being just as smart and capable as them.

Or both.

Both was good.

Maria didn’t avoid them, but she couldn’t deny that she liked working in the lab when they weren’t around. Which was why this afternoon was great, she thought with a smile as she changed pipette tips to begin dispensing her PCR mix.

As soon as she did, of course, the magnetic lock on the lab door beeped, warning Maria that someone was about to come in. She grimaced, but all she had to do was finish setting up her reaction, put it in the machine, and then she could leave the lab for three hours. She could deal with them.

She quickly dispensed her mix and got up to get her DNA samples from the freezer, which…of course, three of the guys were congregated around.

“Excuse me,” she said perfunctorily, intent on the freezer hatch.

“How’s your project going?” Talal asked, managing to make it sound like an insult. He didn’t move out of the way.

“Great, thanks,” Maria replied, like he had been genuinely interested. “I just need to confirm my DNA samples.” She emphasized the last words with another gesture at the freezer.

He sneered and began to step aside, but a comment from Sibrand kept Maria from her goal.

“So, how did you get into this lab anyway?”

“Really?” She leveled him with a dark stare. “I’ve been here for a year, and you’re asking me this now?”

He shrugged and crossed his arms, drawing himself up. “Because I heard you had to do a couple of favors for Dr. Sable.”

Her jaw actually dropped, and she said lowly, “Are you implying that I slept my way into this research facility?” She had no clue where they had gotten that idea—did her messy bun, sweatpants, and old hoodie say harlot or…?

Sibrand shrugged again. “Your words, not mine. But also, yes.”

She saw red, and before she had time to really consider whether or not it might be a bad idea, she had punched the asshole in the throat, hard. And Maria was no weakling; she knew that it would hurt. By the way that it left him clutching at his throat and gasping for breath, yeah, she had done a good job.

Her voice was barely above a hiss when she spoke. “I got into this lab the same way any of you did—I took Dr. Sable’s class, and he was impressed with my work—enough that he asked me personally if I wanted to do research.”

She figured they must all have been stunned by her impulsive act of violence, or else they would be reacting, but she was done with those troglodytes. Her experiment could wait until tomorrow; she was going home.

She paused only to get her backpack from her lab bench and then she was out the door, in the elevator, and out the building.

She didn’t actually remember the walk to the commuter parking lot; one moment she was leaving the biology building, the next she was getting into her car.

She was just so angry and upset and horrified and betrayed that it was all mixing together into a mess of emotion that was nullifying itself into a kind of achy numbness.

Everything felt unreal. It was only half past three, and she never went home before six or seven in the evening. Her hand were steady on the steering wheel as she drove back to the apartment she shared with Altair and Malik, but her knuckles were white, clenched down.

She pulled into her customary parking spot at the complex and walked up the stairs to her front door, unlocking it absently and dropping her backpack right inside the threshold. She made a beeline for the bag of cheetos that was sitting out on the kitchen counter, grabbed it, and took it back to her bedroom, not entirely sure what it was she wanted to do, but sure that she wanted salty, cheesy, MSG-y carbs while she did it.

She read. She watched cat videos on the internet. She played video games. She took a nap. She ate the entire bag of cheetos.

Finally, the sun outside was beginning to angle downwards toward the horizon, and she figured she couldn’t put it off any longer.

She opened her school email. As she had been expecting, and dreading, there was an email from Dr. Sable in her inbox waiting for her.

She stared at it for a long time before finally clicking it open.

It was simple. It was short. It was damnation.

“Don’t bother coming in anymore.”

Well, that was it. She had been fired. And just like that, the dam of numbness broke and all the rage, white-hot, came flooding back. This wasn’t her fault! Yeah, she had punched the guy, but he had been the one making his completely-uncalled-for assertions. Just as quickly, hopelessness swept through her, because she needed a lab if she was going to finish her project. But she had great credentials…there was another professor that would take her…right? She would have to start researching that right now.

She clicked over to the biology faculty but didn’t scroll down the list.

Her head felt tight and fuzzy with how mad she was, and her teeth were clenched so hard that she could hear them grinding together. Tears prickled in her eyes and she felt a rush of shame on top of all her anger.

Of course, the door opened right then, and Altair called out to her.

“Hey, Maria, are you here?”

She took a moment to make sure her voice was steady before replying. “Yeah,” she said.

She heard footsteps heading back toward her room and god damn it she really just wanted to be alone.

“You got home really early today—are you feeling alright?” he asked, poking his head in the open door.

Maria made a quick effort to wipe her eyes, but Altair was more perceptive than he let on, and she could tell by his expression that he had noticed something wrong. Perplexing her, however, he disappeared, and, as the front door opened again he immediately yelled, “Malik! Code mauve!”

There was a thump like Malik dropped whatever he was carrying where he stood, and Maria took the tiny moment of solitude to wipe her face and try to regain a semblance of calm.

About as long as it takes an angry grad student to walk from the front door to her bedroom later, Malik appeared, face dark.

“Who did the thing? Who do I have to rip limb from limb?”

Altair joined in, “I have access to diseases that can kill them, or chemicals that can give them cancer. Your choice.”

She wanted to be annoyed with them, but she found herself laughing at how protective they were.

She uncurled from her computer chair and sniffed. “I don’t think I’ll be needing any murders, but if you want to temporarily sabotage the equipment in Dr. Sable’s lab, I think I’d like that.”

Altair and Malik looked at each other, then back at her. They spoke at the same time.

“What happened?”

“What did those assholes do this time?”

Maria was quiet for a long moment; she still wasn’t sure she wanted to talk about it (though, by cracking her joke, she realized she had kind of roped herself into it).

She sighed. “One of his boys decided that the only possible way that a woman could be working in such a good research lab was by sleeping with the professor.”

“And you’re certain murder’s off the table?” Altair asked lowly.

“Don’t worry; I already punched him in the throat.”

“Good for you!” Malik said, then, made a face. “You didn’t get punished for that, did you?”

Maria grimaced. “I actually kind of…got kicked out of the lab.”

“And you’re certain murder’s off the table,” Altair repeated, even more threateningly.

Maria tried to laugh, but it came out bitter and a little hysterical. “Not gonna lie—I’m a little overwhelmed right now. I’m going to see if another one of the professors might take me into their labs.”

The dark look vanished from Altair’s face. “That’s easy; Dr. Mualim always has room in his lab. You can come work with us.”

Maria grimaced. “You know about my project, though. It’s not really even…related to what you guys are doing, at all. I thought I would go talk to the other molecular biology professor…what’s his name…”

She turned back to her laptop and started scrolling down the faculty page, but Malik provided the name for her.

“Dr. Bouchart. I, um, I wouldn’t get your hopes up, Maria.”

She gave him a puzzled look.

“He and Dr. Sable are good friends.”

Her face fell, but immediately after hardened again. She shrugged, and said, far more casually than she felt, “Well, I’ll never know until I try.”

Malik and Altair both nodded.

“Good luck,” Malik said, sounding sincere. “Do you want anything for dinner?”

She glanced down at the empty bag of cheetos on the floor near her.

“I’m good, thanks.”

She had an email to write.

_________________________________________

Dr. Bouchart’s lab was, apparently, full, she discovered upon reading his reply when she woke up the next morning.

Maria made a face at the email, suspecting what had actually gone on. The lab thugs had told Dr. Sable a horribly biased version of what had transpired the day before, and he had, in turn, gossiped about it to his buddies, either before or after kicking her out.

Well, there was only one thing to do.

She set her laptop on the floor beside her bed and went to wake Altair up. He was a heavy sleeper.

Kicking his door in seemed like a good way to get his attention.

She didn’t want to break it, so she carefully twisted the knob and opened the door a crack before kicking it soundly.

Altair sat straight up, hi brown hair sticking up gravity-defying spikes.

“What the fuck,” he said, flopping back down and turning to glare at her. “It’s not even nine yet.”

“Yep, and I need your help.”

“Can I help you in a few hours?”

“Yes, or you can help me now, since you’re already conveniently awake.”

“I wonder how that could have happened.”

“Truly, it’s a mystery. Anyway, Bouchart’s a douchebag. Can you get me into your lab?”

“Not right now.”

“Well, obviously. It’s 8:30 on a Saturday. But, I mean, in general. You are Dr. Mualim’s Golden Boy.”

“I am not his Golden Boy.”

“Except for the part where you totally are.”

“Yes I can get you into my lab,” he said, changing the subject.

“Great! As for today, can you help me break into Dr. Sable’s lab so I can move all my samples for my project to your lab? I don’t want him throwing them away.”

Altair sat up again, clearly intrigued. “Breaking and entering? I like it.”

Maria shrugged. “I guess I’ve gone to the dark side.”

“Nah, just the immunology department. Like molecular biology, but with practical applications,” Altair said with a yawn, swinging his legs so that he was sitting on the edge of his mattress.

“Hey!”

He grinned, straightening his t-shirt where it had gotten rumpled in his sleep. “Biochem. Biochem is the dark side.”

She shook her head. “Well, let’s get dressed and do this thing. Should we invite Malik along for the espionage?”

Altair thought about it, but said, “Nah, let him sleep. He’s got strong morals about this sort of thing.”

Maria went back to her room and changed out of her pajamas, brushed her hair, and put it back up in a ponytail, and met Altair in the kitchen, her finger on the tip of her nose.

“Nose goes on driving,” she announced, and Altair sighed dramatically, but grabbed his car keys off the counter and they went down to the parking lot.

Since it was a weekend, and many professors stayed home, they parked directly at the building instead of across campus at the commuter lot. She glanced around—good. Dr. Sable didn’t often come in on Saturdays, she knew from experience, and when he did, it was almost always in the afternoons.

At the back door to the biology building, Maria flashed her student ID, and the door unlocked to let her in. Huh, at least she had access to the building; maybe she still had access to the lab. That would make the breaking and entering bit…really easy.

They took the elevator up to the fourth floor and walked down the hall to the door of the lab, the windows of which were dark. Good, no one was there.

Maria held her ID up to the sensor.

It flashed red and beeped angrily.

“Uh-oh, he revoked my card access already,” she said, trying again for good measure.

For shits and giggles, they tried Altair’s, too, and his had the same result.

“Is this the only entrance to the lab?” Altair asked.

“Um, no, it connects to a classroom down the hall—and the classroom has a traditional lock! You know how to pick locks—right? Did you bring a lockpick?”

Altair gave her a look. “Maria, you told me we were breaking into a lab.” He fished in his pocket and pulled out a slightly-bent piece of metal. “Of course I brought a lockpick. I may need one of your hairpins, too, though.”

They walked down to the door of the classroom and Altair set to work on picking the lock, as Maria kept watch, eternally grateful that this building didn’t have video surveillance like the chemistry building did. She had a scare when she heard some footsteps coming by, but they turned down a different hallway, and, not two minutes later, Altair got the lock.

He opened the door and ushered her in dramatically, clearly expecting praise. Normally she wasn’t one to feed his ego, but, hey, he was doing this for her.

“Color me impressed,” she said, walking into the empty classroom and over to the side door that led into her old lab.

She flipped on the light in the lab and grabbed a pair of gloves, putting them on before opening the freezer.

“What are we looking for?” Altair said, looking at the jumbled mess in the container (honestly, no one else in that lab had a sense of organization).

“Three boxes labeled with my name, and one box labeled ‘antibodies,’” she said, moving sample boxes around until she found one of hers.

Altair found two more, and Maria found the last one. She put the lid of the freezer back, and Altair asked.

“Anything else you need to get?”

She thought for a moment, and asked.

“You have stuff for DNA prep in your lab—and blotting, and PCR, right?”

“I work in an immunology lab, not the seventeenth century. Yes, we have that stuff.” He sounded put out.

“Then I’m good; let’s get this into a freezer.”

They carried her boxes to the elevator and up to the top floor where Altair’s lab was, and he used his card to get them in. He cleared a space in their freezer and Maria piled her boxes.

She smiled at him as the freezer door shut.

“Beginning of an era,” she said.

“Yeah,” he agreed. “Let’s go home; I have sleep to catch up on.”

“Not sorry,” she said.

He nudged her playfully as they walked back to his car. She was a lot happier today than she had been—technically, nothing was fixed yet. Dr. Mualim still needed to approve her, but she thought she was a strong candidate, especially with his Golden Boy on her side.

It wasn’t a complete disaster.

When they got back to the apartment, Malik was awake and making notes in a field journal on the couch.

“Where have you two been?” he asked.

“Breaking into my old lab,” Maria said casually.

Malik made a slightly judgey face, but he just sighed, shook his head, and cracked a tiny Malik-smile.

“You guys.”

“You love us,” Altair insisted, sitting down on the couch with him and stealing a grape off his plate.

“I never said anything of the sort.”

Maria interjected, “Well, I love you both. Seriously, thanks for your help with this whole…kerfuffle.”

She went around to the couch and insinuated herself between them, putting an arm around each of them and pulling them in.

Nope. It wasn’t a complete disaster. Not by a long shot.


End file.
